Merry Christmas 


Christ came to save
Making His love to stay
Not just for this day
But everyday to remain.

Came as a little infant
Laid in that manger
From birth
The path of humility He paved.

All for love He came
To bring redemption to reign
Illuminating every darkness
The joy of salvation He made.

Not just for a soul
Neither for a while,
But forever to every heart who believes
That He came for all to save.

Merry Christmas To You!

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Times Like These

In times like these;
When everything is odd
And life seems like a toil
When all hope seems lost
And every help seems gone,
It’s meant to be
And you’re meant to overcome
If you couldn’t handle it
God wouldn’t have allowed it.

It’s for a season,
A reason;
To make you grow
And to help you glow;
To scale through
Just like every Patriarch,
To learn from their experience
And see the trials of our faith
As something unique,
A Precious gem.

It was meant to make you stronger
And to bring out your testimony
As a light
And a reassurance to every heart;
Every heart out there
That needs an assurance of hope.

You are greater than your hurts
Shake it off and remember
Times like these never last
It’s just for a while
And this time will pass
And your appointed time will surface.
Keep being strong….

A Young Girl Wish For Christmas 

Dear Lord,
I thank you for bringing me this far in 2016. Though I don’t have a reasonable clothe neither do I have any shoes but my wish for Christmas is that:
You do something new in my life that is beyond human reasoning and that you bless my Family and make us strong in you and more so that you bless every eyes that might mistakenly read this and meet their heart desires and heal the pain in their hearts that words cannot utter.

I hope the postman gets this to you soon. But I know you are reading over my head. Now can you hasten it to perform it? I know you will and I bless you for that.

Much Love From Your Best Friend and Daughter

A New Hope 

Dear Depression,

Thank you for coming into my life and changing my initiative about some things. You played a great role in helping me understand myself and what I can gain from solitude.

I still thank you for the times you made me understand someone’s feelings. Thank you for the times you made me realize how much pain someone can go through with depression. No! I’ll never see someone nursing depression and think they are acting silly. I understand their plight and I can feel the taunt they suffer from you from a distance.

You showed me how strong I can be. But I have to say this “your time is up!” You were a good friend, so I thought until I knew you were a fiend in disguise.

You know, I have suffered enough sleepless nights where I contemplate my life. I am tired of soiling my pillows with tears of the silent cry from the pain.

Enough of the cuts I make to let the frustration out. Enough of the overdose that turned to an addiction. Enough of making me ignore the people that loves me.

Like a lover who is stressed out of their partner hurt, I stand my ground ready to let go of you completely. I know you might see this as a joke and think I can’t do without you. Well, now I know that is the lie you have always used to tie me down and blind me from the truth.

I can do without you! I have opened up to a friend you made me loathe so much. I let Him in and I gave Him the keys. Even though I never wanted to hear His name(all thanks to you), I have found love and true solace in Him.

I’m fine now and I don’t need your help. Not like I found an escape route once again, but this time, I found a comfort zone, a place of true peace and tranquility.

I saw you raising your head and peeping in a while ago. I felt I should let you in. But then I recall the keys were not with me.

Just today, I saw you pass by. You hardly give up on your victim huh? I’m glad to say this “You can’t get this victim back!” Mount up your forces and come against me with all your might, I’m not scared neither bothered. My heart has been renewed from nursing fear.

Now I can open up to love again. I can love those two love me without any ought. I know I will find someone who will look beyond the scars and hurts that you left behind and all your lies of “no one can love you like this” will be buried in truth.

I know it’s hard to say ‘goodbye’ but with all my heart and all I have I say it out loud “Goodbye Depression!”
I don’t hope to have you around ever again!

Your former lover Fikayomi

Let It Go 

*LET IT GO*

My little niece picked up an almost empty tin of jam and ran away with it. In a bid to stop her from consuming the little in the tin, her mum showed her the new and full one and stretched it to her maybe she will release it but she held on to it and started crying for the new one without letting go of the other one.

As I laughed at her, it dawned on me that we are sometimes like my niece running helter skelter with our troubles, holding on to it even when God says *”let it go”*

Most times we hold on to past pain, anger, setbacks and what have you and we keep praying for a Change while we can’t still let go of the former in our hearts.

You might have been wondering why you have what you desire at sight but can’t get a hold of it, God is calling out to you and asking you to let go of what you’re holding on to to have a better one.

You can’t mix old wine with the new, it will only mess up both and make it of no use.
See, *”There is no place of greatness for anyone who doesn’t strives to improve.*

What is it that you have been holding on to for so long?

It’s time to let go and pick up a better one that God is pointing you to.

Let it go!

#KPIFAMILY

Potency Of Love

Love;
It reaches down your soul;
Gladdens your spirit
Eliminate your fears
Brings hope alive
And births a new YOU.

Love;
Never can you deny its power,
Nor its euphoria be ignored.
Its existence can never be shunned;
‘Cause even when you think it’s gone,
It raise up its head to say “I was once here.”

Love;
See how far a little of it can stretch;
How deep it can search;
Just how high it will mount
And How farther it can soar
When given a chance into that Heart.

Apologies  To My Younger Self 

Dear Younger Self,
It’s been a while I wrote you last. I know you might have been wondering what’s up with me.

Well, I have been feeling guilty. Guilty for all the promises we made back then that I haven’t been able to fulfill.

I’ve always wanted my next note to you be filled with all the fulfilment of dreams we both had. But I don’t want to keep postponing it.

See, so many things happened that even if I try to explain, my explanation will never suffice. It might eventually turn out as many empty, flimsy excuses.

Like I said, it’s a “Letter Of Apology!”

I’m sorry I failed to be a graduate at age 20.
I’m sorry I didn’t study nursing like we both aspired to.

I’m sorry I didn’t get married at age 22 like we both planned. See, I got to understand so much about that word called “Marriage” our parents must have had to do a lot of research to stick to each other that much or maybe they feigned it just for a ‘make believe’ to us their kids.
I’m still not sure about relationships yet. I’m not sure if I’m scared or maybe I just can’t make any sense out of it or maybe, it’s not yet time.
Believe me, it’s the least thing on my mind right now and I need you to forgive me double on that.

I’m sorry I didn’t live up to our dream of becoming like Stella Obasanjo in look and in achievements. I realized I can only be ME and I don’t need to be like anybody else.

I’m sorry I forgot about our dream to have a Foundation, an organization; just something for the less privilege kids and orphans at age 24. I know this was our greatest goal. But I messed it up bae! I was carried away by life’s storm and it had a hard toll on me.
Though lately something has been waking up that goal within me. After each “Thank you Father!” every morning, my heart draws to “That Child” that needs love and care somewhere. I pray for “That Child” and hope they remain strong.
I see every child as my own and I feel their pain to a fault I always defend them when they are blamed or judged unduly.

I’m sorry I wasn’t able to live up to our plans. All we planned and dreamed of became as nothing because I loosed sight of it.

Sorry for the things I never said.
Sorry for the people I never loved.
Sorry for the time I was weak.
Sorry for being timid for so long.

Dear, I hope you understand and pardon me. You just have to see what life had turned out to be.
Not like I’m trying to apportion blames or give excuses, but growing up and living our dreams is more than what we thought it was back then.

Life is filled with surprises dear and it always unfold what it has for us gradually.
I was an ‘eejit’ for revolving in a circle and brawling over each surprises that unfolds without seeing a need to pick the good in it and move on.

Life is beautiful, but I didn’t understand because it always turns the dark side to me. Well, so I thought!

I realized I can move on and be what I want to be if I could only muster the courage to believe. Life wasn’t that hard after all and we can scale through every challenge it brings our way.

It’s like a puzzle that we have to take our time out to fix. We have to pick some and drop some because it doesn’t fit in.
It’s somehow tiring and it gets boring especially when you have a big picture to fix. But in the end, it’s always beautiful and orderly though the fixing and arranging takes time.

Life leaves us with a quest to solve and brings a riddle to sort out every now and then.
We just have to keep sailing and know that life goes on despite its difficulties.

I believe my next note to you will be filled with many good tidings and most of our dreams and the ones you know nothing about will have come to fulfilment.

I hope you understand my reasons for not writing to you for a long while.
Thank You for understanding and most importantly, Thank You for teaching me to be strong from my early years.

I still love you and that love is pushing and motivating me to do more to see you fulfilled.

Your Matured Self
Fkayomi

Have You Ever?

Have you ever wished you are better than what you are now?

Have you ever wished you got all you ever wanted without settling for less than you deserve?

Have you ever craved to be loved, cared for and understood by everyone around you?
Have you ever cried and wished the tears could wash away your pain and make you feel hale and hearty?

Have you ever cried while you smiled?
Have you ever hated what you should have loved?
Have you ever disowned a friend to gain an enemy?
Have you ever seen life’s contradictions?
Have you ever tried to end it all ’cause no one believes in your prowess and even the least person you expect also looks down on you?

This is not the unsung songs-they were simply unheard;
This is not a strange occurrence-they are hidden truth;
Life’s contradictions-clouds without water!
Life’s contradictions-streams without pool!
Life’s contradictions-snails without shell.
Life’s contradictions-hearts without love.
Have you ever wished for more?

Goodbye Cut! 

I Saw those thin small lines on my hands and those scars brought back dark memories.
.
Rumminate how I cried myself to sleep everynight
Depression was always there to haunt
Words in my head ever ready to taunt
Everything about me was odd and I knew I wasn’t sound
Voices screaming in my head to “end it all now!”

Suicidal thoughts gives you many option, but the most suitable was to cut.
It wasn’t exigent like some vigorous sport
All I need was just some sharps to make the big cut.
My first attempt wasn’t bad when I tried
I couldn’t feel the pain though I cried.
Gave it a second try again and I bled like a dye
Blood red like crimson flowed
But I didn’t give a damn.
It was becoming an addiction
But I didn’t care!

My blood flowing
With a pleasing feeling
As I watched the blood oozing through my parted skin
What a great feeling
A means of escape from my emotional feelings
How good it feels when the edge of the blade kisses that skin with the lie that:
It relieves the emotional pain.

I never knew I was rapidly relapsing
The next morning bath, a burning sensation that stings
Through the blade-scratched skin
It always felt so warm and a bit refreshing
I couldn’t have asked for anything more
Slitting my skin open was an escape route
An escape route from the moment;
An escape route to deceive all that “I’m fine”

Stepping out to face the world was a tedious task
The scars always too visible to hide
Long sleeves and jackets helps disguise
I’ll say “I’m comfortable in it” even in a hot class.
Cutting is a fiend but I never knew
I felt it was a way to be free from every guile
Addictive, but I never understood
Self destructive, but no one gave me a clue.

“Who will save me from myself?”
I often wailed within
I hide and cry and promise to ditch the Bitch
But yet again I find myself constantly going back to cut
Watching the blood oozing till it clots
I pick my phone and make a call
Maybe I’ll feel distracted for a while
But I find myself slitting the sharps through at the statement “I’m fine”

How much longer do I have to see you as a reliever?
How much longer do I have to leave those sharps and yet again turn back to it for solace?
Now I know I’m addicted to a silly way of life
But how can I condemn what brings me solace?
I craved to be free from me, but possibilities were eluded from me.

After my failed attempts to stop;
I was really hurt!
Cutting was my way of coping,
Ignorantly destroying myself gradually.
I never knew I didn’t worth to be in a self-destructive gloom
I wish I knew better then than to believe the lie of my feelings
I wish I knew earlier that I can fight the faceless enemy within
I wish I knew I’m stronger than the voices in my head.
But now I realize it’s never too late to break free!

Dear one,
You are your own voice and it’s time to face the faceless enemy. Trying to stop cutting is like trying to stop living. You free your pain and hurt at the sight of the oozing blood and your only faith of relief is in that scratch you leave on your skin. But gradually, you’re destroying yourself. Self destruction is what you are into and given your life to it and making yourself believe: its the only option or purpose you have.
It’s time to let the past go because you don’t have to live in it anymore!
Put the blade down because you know you’re worth it!
Find hope in the place of hurt!

It’s the best way you know to survive, but can you look beyond the joy and said relief and see a more perfect help?
You don’t deserve the cuts you make. Let the past remain as a scar for you to move forward with a better hope because there’s always hope out there for you.Save yourself from a heart full of pain and sorrow and see reasons to live another day with joy of being a survivor!

I eventually knew I didn’t have to pull such silly stunts to survive.
I understood my perfect help was and is God
He was always on guard, though I Was too blinded to see Him.
To see you happy is His joy
Life in him is tangled with joy
And I’m glad I can now move on despite my scars and introduce Him to you too!
My scars leaves a sign to tell of who I used to be. I stare at it today and smile at the thought of the great survivor I’ll always be.

I look forward to a day we will all look at our scars and boldly say: Goodbye cut!

Photo Credit: picturequotes.com

Inspired by: beautifulkindofthoughts

Posted in Uncategorized

Suicidal Needs Your Help

Have you ever heard someone say “I feel like committing suicide?” I know your response will be “what’s my business with that? It’s your life go and do as you please”.

I’ve heard so many blames on suicidals . We see them as people who are heartless, mad, stupid, demonic or even possessed.
Maybe they are, maybe they’re not, we can only tell if we are in their shoes.

Listening to people who attempted suicide, it was terrible for them. They had so many things in consideration, but that was the only solution and way of escape they could think of at that moment. They had gotten to the peak, they had lost the taste of what it means to live. They were frustrated and depressed. Suicide was an option, an escape route. In fact, the best option for them!

Do you know committing suicide is not just a decision one takes in 24hours? It is a decision one takes after many years of hardship, suffering, hunger, loneliness, pain, neglect, etc., as the case may be.
But, I still find it difficult to blame them sometimes. When they were craving for help, care and attention, when they needed the “don’t give up” words, and a little assurance that “everything will be okay”. When they needed a smile and someone to encourage them, no one was ready to help, no one was available. We were all busy with a thing or the other. Now the deed is done and we are all set to apportion blame. We are all ready to point them as hell bond.Probably they were reclusive, but even if they’d open up about their predicaments, would you have cared?

Suicidals are wicked, heartless and it’s a foolish decision to commit suicide, I know! But do you know how many smiling faces are depressed within? Do you even care to know? Do you know how many lives you would have saved if you had just given them your “little” attention to see beyond that smiling face and know that something is wrong?
People commit suicide because they know so little about themselves, thy have no idea what and who they were meant to be in Christ, but who is ready to shed the light of truth to them?

Instead of blaming those who are gone, can we just apply that same energy, intelligence and time to help and encourage those who are still alive and might be contemplating on giving it up and throwing in the towel completely?
I know with the current situation of the country, you care less about others but that little attention, that little care, the little act of love, those few words of encouragement can change minds. They can reverse that action, they can heal a broken soul and make a wounded heart stop bleeding.

We ignore these facts and apportion blames on the victims.
People nursing depression will NEVER talk about it for fear of what I don’t know…
But if everyone is observant of their neighbors enough, we can always see it in their face and in their actions.
Let us stop trying to fix what isn’t broken and concentrate on what’s beneficial for humanity (love and care).

Always demonstrate kindness to everyone around you(Maybe we always expect a pay back that’s why we find it hard to help others in our own little way).
See it as an opportunity and a necessity to help. We are meant to help each other.
May God help us to be there for each other and save all those who are downcast in spirit..

Photo Credit: picturequotes.com